Eat, Pray, Drive to Wisconsin to Buy Beer

I live in Chicago and thank God I am close enough to Wisconsin, the beer capital of America.

Real women don’t drink light beer…but some do drink fruity beer and I am obsessed. I will drive one-hour out of my way for New Glarus’ seasonal Apple Ale…and luckily I was able to get my hands on some today. Ever since I was a kid it’s been a tradition to stop at Mars Cheese Castle, a palace of local made brats, cheese, beer, hot sauce, and other gluttonous goods. While heading to Door County a few weeks ago we made our usual pit stop and to my disappointment, there was none on the shelves.

I checked the New Glarus beer schedule…yes they have a beer schedule…and I was sad when I saw that Apple Ale was in season, but no where to be found. When I went to the brewery last month I was told that it only comes around after the Fall harvest, which would make sense, but nope…it had to be somewhere. When we got to Fish Creek, WI, my father and I walked into a tiny local market and to my surprise I found three four-packs hiding in a cooler at the back of the store. I grabbed a cart, cleaned them out and that was the only supply I could get my hands on…until we headed home.

Thanks to my brother for having to use the “facilities” we stopped at Mars Cheese Castle again and I nearly flipped the f–k out when I saw that the shelves and coolers were fully stocked. As I previously mentioned, this beer sadly only comes in four packs…and they don’t sell cases of it so I’m forced to buy excessive amounts.

To make a long story short…I bought 32 bottles of beer that day and today after a random road trip to Mars Cheese Castle I bought 32 more. In my dad’s eyes, I’m stocking up for the fall…now winter. In my mom’s eyes I’m an alcoholic who needs to stop spending almost $200 on beer.

Yes I know, hefty price tag…but I’m a craft beer lover and if I could only drink New Glarus Apple Ale for the rest of my life, I would. It’s not a beer that I drink to get drunk. It’s a flavor of a beer that I find uniquely irresistible and I can’t get anything like it in my city. I limit myself to one bottle each time I drink it because it’s so hard to come by. Oh and if you want to try some, you’re allowed one sip and then it’s “Drive to Wisconsin and get your own damn ale.”

New Glarus…don’t stop making this stuff…otherwise you will have a very angry and weepy customer.


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