I am a loaded gun who is passionate as hell. It shows in my ambition, determination, the way I speak, and anything that I deeply, truly, and honestly, care about. I’m a person who is bitter, slightly enraged on a daily basis, with the mouth of a vulgar pirate. Though I despise the human race, I always look for the good in a person and the positive traits they possess. Once I find them, I’ll try to bring them out of you to make you aware of them.
On the other hand, I am no force to be reckoned with. Flip the switch in the heart and I am vicious, vindictive, and mean, with a sharp tongue. I spit daggers. This means I have left my fucks to give at home, and I am on vacation. When I am done, I am done, and I will not make an effort to salvage the fucks I once gave.
I can also handle the cards that I’m dealt, and shuffle them to keep myself happy. That took years of hard work. 12 to be exact. The reason is that I’ve been taught that there is no value to seeing the negative in everything, yet it’s easy to see the negative in everyone. Though sometimes there’s a reason for it.
If you’ve never been honest with yourself on a piece of paper, it’s therapeutic. I highly recommend it. 😉
Please take a seat at the table of my life and listen, because not everyone gets invited.
These past four months have been, well, a shit storm and I’m just reeeeally hoping that on Jan 1, 2017 at midnight I can take a breath of fresh air and mentally mellow the fuck out.
As much as my body has proven to me lately that it is oh so certainly stressed, I haven’t been feeling it mentally, oddly enough. That is until these past two months. I’ve hit a point in my life where I need to step back out of my comfort zone and be that bad ass adult that I am destined to be, without any excuses. It’s time to dust off this ladder of life and climb that son of a bitch. I know which direction I’m headed in and I have to admit that it’s kind of scary, but I’m excited to soon have a place of my own, marry my best friend, and settle into a job that I can enjoy for years to come. I just need to be willing to sacrifice and embrace change.
I have been in complete #nofucksgiven mode for the past month and I’ve hit my breaking point. If I don’t like something, I get stuck in the notion of disliking it until I can change the outcome. If I don’t like someone, well that can go any way depending on the individual, but you will definitely hear about it. When I feel like my creativity is being sucked bone dry, I am going to take the straw out of that sucker’s mouth and return it dipped in glitter and gold.
2017 will be the year of change in finances, freedom and fitness. Meanwhile, 2016, you can exit stage left you dirty disappointment.
For I have broken the cardinal rule of blogging. The cardinal rule that is: one must thought post on their blog as if it is their job. Oops.
Well we all have lives (real jobs) and busy schedules, but that is no excuse for ignoring yourself.
After graduating I went on a “writing hiatus.” I kept thinking, “Hey Dana, you’ve been writing for five years straight so give yourself a break.” Well that break turned into a year, hence why I started this blog. I rant, I rave, I have emotions and writing has always helped me deal with my crazy mind.
As a kid I wrote poems. When I got older and read them I thought they were stupid, but hey, they meant something to me at the time. I’m a hopeless romantic, so as a teenager there was a lot of “I love him, I hate him, I wanna burn you in the eye with a cigarette so you can feel how I feel…” Okay that last part was a little dramatic, but teenagers are dramatic.
My motto is and always has been that the paper doesn’t judge you. Write exactly what you feel. However, if you don’t want anyone to read what you feel, then you better lock that journal up in a safe with a pass code.