I am a loaded gun who is passionate as hell. It shows in my ambition, determination, the way I speak, and anything that I deeply, truly, and honestly, care about. I’m a person who is bitter, slightly enraged on a daily basis, with the mouth of a vulgar pirate. Though I despise the human race, I always look for the good in a person and the positive traits they possess. Once I find them, I’ll try to bring them out of you to make you aware of them.
On the other hand, I am no force to be reckoned with. Flip the switch in the heart and I am vicious, vindictive, and mean, with a sharp tongue. I spit daggers. This means I have left my fucks to give at home, and I am on vacation. When I am done, I am done, and I will not make an effort to salvage the fucks I once gave.
I can also handle the cards that I’m dealt, and shuffle them to keep myself happy. That took years of hard work. 12 to be exact. The reason is that I’ve been taught that there is no value to seeing the negative in everything, yet it’s easy to see the negative in everyone. Though sometimes there’s a reason for it.
If you’ve never been honest with yourself on a piece of paper, it’s therapeutic. I highly recommend it. 😉
I’m laying in bed right now, trying to fall asleep. So naturally, I start having a full blown conversation with my conscience.
At this very moment. I lay here in my warm cozy bed and appreciate everything that I have and don’t have. The reason why I feel this way is because life is too goddamn short to worry about petty bullshit. I have a pulse right now dammit and I will do what it takes to make it thrive.
Over the years, I’ve lost people I’ve had close relationships with, long relationships, that were abruptly ended by death. I miss these people every day and would give anything to give them an update on my wellbeing. There is no worse feeling than not knowing when your last goodbye to someone will be. I’m sickened by the thought. You can go from being on cloud 9 and thinking that you’re the happiest you’ve ever been then boom, your world shatters into shards and you have to put the pieces back together.
What I’m saying here is, whoever you’re close with, hug them tight and count your blessings. Make that person laugh so hard that they cry and admire the expressions on their face when they do.
Most importantly, appreciate what you have, because in the words of The Eagles, “We may lose and we may win, but we will never be here again.”
So after I got all of the new hire paperwork out of my way I discovered I had 23 press releases that were assigned to my name. I only got to submit one, but the best part is that I can go in tomorrow morning and WRITE.
Thoughts of the day include:
My coworkers are super friendly and welcoming.
I’m excited to write each and every one of my 22 assignments. I even have an organized list on how to attack them accurately and efficiently.
I have my own cubicle that I’m going to start personalizing IMMEDIATELY to make it feel more like home.
Traffic was a breeze. (knocks on wood)
The only down side is now I have to turn into a grandma and go to sleep at a decent hour.
BUT I’M EXCITED TO GO TO WORK! YAY!